Mum, are you hiding?
Growing up, I was the shy, invisible kid.
I was content to hide in the books I read, escaping as I journeyed to intriguing and exciting places with the various characters.
I was the girl who never spoke.
So I know what it feels like to be alive but going through the motions, seen and not heard, present but not part of the conversation.
This continued into my 20s and what seemed like many Kate Winslet moments in Titanic where I felt like my world was surreal. I knew I couldn’t go on like this.
So, I became a Christian and realised I had lived with decades of fear buried deep within.
And so the process started.
It felt a lot like 1 step forward, two steps backwards.
Sometimes when you start digging, you unearth all kinds of stuff – the good, the bad and the oh so ugly!
I realised my self-talk was incredibly negative!!! My thoughts were negative, and my actions were negative.
When I started paying attention to my self-talk, I realised that I was continually playing words like “I hate myself, I hate myself.”
Imagine what a destructive cycle that was!
It took a lot of studying the bible, saying positive confessions, reading books, and listening to messages that I finally began to see myself in a new light. I began to have fresh hope, desire and knowing that somehow everything would be alright.
I began to understand who I truly was and that I was laden with giftings and talents that were the answer to the problems a tribe of people needed.
However, I now hit another snag. I WAS AFRAID TO SHINE!
Has anybody been there?
Sometimes you become so used to cowering, hiding, and playing down who you are that it becomes who you are.
I remember so clearly the day it hit me that that was what I had been doing.
I passed a beautiful Cherry Blossom tree in all its glory and admired it, taking in its breathtaking beauty and splendour, and then it dawned on me.
The cherry blossom tree was created to be unique, and it sure wasn’t downplaying who it was, thinking, hmmm, the other trees will be wondering, “Who does she think she is?” or the other trees will be saying, “Is it because she is ….”
See how ludicrous that even sounds!!!
I was so enamoured by this tree in all its majestic glory, standing out effortlessly amongst all other trees. It indeed was a sight to behold
So, I finally got to the point where I was like, let’s do this!
I had begun to understand certain things that came naturally to me, I had always had an entrepreneurial flair, and I realised what I was passionate about
I became a certified digital marketing professional and started my business called DigitalMakeovers. In it, I help women in their 40s (like myself) and over who are overwhelmed by Social Media start to get consistent clients in as little as six weeks using my SIMPLE SALES SYSTEM.
However, my dad passed away a few years later, turning my world upside down. I questioned everything.
When I returned to the UK (after going back home for the funeral), I asked myself, “now what?”. Having heard the various eulogies, been moved by the multitude of people whose lives he had touched and reminded again of the legacy he left. I knew some things couldn’t remain the same!
I said to myself, well, it’s either now or never! If there was ever a time when I needed to take things to another level (or 10!), it was now. I guess losing a loved one or losing a parent does something to you. It gave me a significant perspective shift!
After that, my business felt like I was on a mission to impact lives, which was my driving force. My dad had always had this mantra – live each day like it’s your last, so I was determined to make each day count!
Fast forward a couple of years during the pandemic, I was hit with health challenges that forced me to revaluate my priorities once again. One of them was, was I going to plunge into my business fully? Before this, I was working and had my business, but somehow, I knew it was time to go all-in, so I did.
So why am I telling you all this, ladies?
Because perhaps you’ve been hiding for one reason or another, something that could be hindering you in your business. Maybe you’ve been saying, “I am a private person”, “I am shy”, “I am an introvert”, and as a result, you are unconsciously dimming your light, subconsciously not giving yourself a seat at the table by playing small.
Today, I have come to tell you that it is time to STOP playing small. It is time to STOP shrinking back from life and start living in all your glory, shining for the world to see!
I’m on a mission to change the way women see and portray themselves online, show them that there is a strategy to it, and start by taking action!
I would love to hold your hand and help you navigate this journey of becoming.
So mums, one last thing. Like you, I have a daughter, and I want the best for her and part of that is showing her she can be whoever she wants to be in the world.
Are you ready to do that for your children?
Will you permit yourself to be the version of yourself you always dreamed of?
I hope so and look forward to seeing you online.
Tayo Soluade
Connect with Tayo: https://linktr.ee/digitalmakeovers
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